06 November 2017

Bachelor's Degree Electronic Engineering ✅



I never thought I would have a picture of my convocation. Before the convocation, I was so lazy and unexcited to go. Thanks to Kakyong who always secretly be my photographer and force me to be her model. Every photo there's Kakyong behind the camera. Hehe. Back then, I was non-social network person and non-taking picture person. I never online to view what other people update to heal myself. I let so many picture of me faded to keep me moving on in my life. Without noticing, it been almost more than 4 years I've been gone. I was gone neither online nor offline. I thought I just want to be gone in this world forever. I felt that I've lost everything. Sometimes I feel unwanted in this world so I decided to backing off. But I believe Allah have better plan for me. Since my death not coming yet, my journey didn't end here. Some of my friends are searching for me and personally request a picture of me. And that's was my first time ever I've send my picture online. My mother used to say "Ingat senang ke nak nampak Nana muncul dalam gambar?".


At one instant, one day, I don't know why I decided to join online business in fact I hate all social network and holding a gadget. Being expose in online world was really not my thing. I just love to be expose to real world more. But it just happen. Well, everything happens for some reason. At least, I know the art in marketing and they can't lie to me no more. 


Sorry, if I'm not beautiful anymore.


Life is simple, keep a person who keep you, leave a person who leave you.


Forgive and forget. Make more mistakes and learn.


Picture lied, word don't.


It's just happened once in a life time. 


Dunia hanyalah setitis air laut yang melekat di jarinya, selebihnya adalah akhirat.









Currently undergoing a digital detox. I won't be available after this. :p


More photo, coming soon....
~Out, busy. 

Look up

I have 422 friends, yet I am lonely.
I speak to all of them everyday, yet none of them really know me.
The problem I have sits in the spaces between,
looking into their eyes, or at a name on a screen.
I took a step back, and opened my eyes,
I looked around, and then realised
that this media we call social, is anything but
when we open our computers, and it’s our doors we shut.
All this technology we have, it’s just an illusion,
of community, companionship, a sense of inclusion
yet when you step away from this device of delusion,
you awaken to see, a world of confusion.
A world where we’re slaves to the technology we mastered,
where our information gets sold by some rich greedy bastard.
A world of self-interest, self-image, self-promotion,
where we share all our best bits, but leave out the emotion.
We are at our most happy with an experience we share,
but is it the same if no one is there.
Be there for you friends, and they’ll be there too,
but no one will be, if a group message will do.
We edit and exaggerate, we crave adulation,
we pretend we don’t notice the social isolation.
We put our words into order, until our lives are glistening,
we don’t even know if anyone is listening.
Being alone isn’t the problem, let me just emphasize,
that if you read a book, paint a picture, or do some exercise,
you are being productive, and present, not reserved or recluse,
you’re being awake and attentive, and putting your time to good use.
So when you’re in public, and you start to feel alone,
put your hands behind your head, and step away from the phone.
You don’t need to stare at your menu, or at your contact list,
just talk to one another, and learn to co-exist.
I can’t stand to hear the silence, of a busy commuter train,
when no one wants to talk through the fear of looking insane.
We’re becoming unsocial, it no longer satisfies
to engage with one another, and look into someone’s eyes.
We’re surrounded by children, who since they were born,
watch us living like robots, and think it’s the norm.
It’s not very likely you will make world’s greatest dad,
if you cant entertain a child without a using an iPad.
When I was a child, I would never be home,
I’d be out with my friends, on our bikes we would roam.
We’d ware holes in our trainers, and graze up our knees;
we’d build our own clubhouse, high up in the trees.
Now the parks are so quiet, it gives me a chill
to see no children outside and the swings hanging still.
There’s no skipping or hopscotch, no church and no steeple,
we’re a generation of idiots, smart phones and dumb people.
So look up from your phone, shut down that display,
take in your surroundings, and make the most of today.
Just one real connection is all it can take,
to show you the difference that being there can make.
Be there in the moment, when she gives you the look,
that you remember forever, as when love overtook.
The time you first hold her hand, or first kiss her lips,
the time you first disagree, but still love her to bits.
The time you don’t need to tell hundreds, about what you’ve just done,
because you want to share the moment, with just this one.
The time you sell your computer, so you can buy a ring,
for the girl of your dreams, who is now the real thing.
The time you want to start a family, and the moment when,
you first hold your baby girl, and get to fall in love again.
The time she keeps you up at night, and all you want is rest,
and the time you wipe away the tears, as your baby flees the nest.
The time your little girl returns, with a boy for you to hold,
and the day he calls you granddad, and makes you feel real old
The time you take in all you’ve made, just by giving life attention,
and how your glad you didn’t waste it, by looking down at some invention.
The time you hold your wife’s hand, and sit down beside her bed
you tell her that you love her, and lay a kiss upon her head.
She then whispers to you quietly, as her heart gives a final beat,
that she’s lucky she got stopped, by that lost boy in the street.
But none of these times ever happened, you never had any of this,
When you’re too busy looking down, you don’t see the chances you miss.
So look up from your phone, shut down those displays,
we have a finite existence, a set number of days.
Why waste all our time getting caught in the net,
as when the end comes, nothing’s worse than regret.
I am guilty too, of being part of this machine,
this digital world, where we are heard but not seen.
Where we type and don’t talk, where we read as we chat,
where we spend hours together, without making eye contact.
Don’t give in to a life where you follow the hype,
give people your love, don’t give them your like.
Disconnect from the need to be heard and defined
Go out into the world, leave distractions behind.
Look up from your phone, shut down that display,
stop watching this video, live life the real way.
-Gary Turk

18 October 2017

Underweight


Currently I'm loosing my weight due to some crisis I'm facing. What crisis? It's secret. Many people tend to ask me how did I manage to keep my weight maintain since high school? Well, it requires long term discipline to achieve it. When I was in high school, I always feel ugly and miserable. I have no friends, no best friends, and no boyfriends. No girlfriends really want to hang out with me. So, to keep myself happy about myself, everyday I always push myself forward with a healthy habits ritual to be a better person and believe that "one day I'll be a beautiful butterfly". Somehow I'm not that butterfly yet. One day, maybe? In my dream. :')

I'm currently facing something I'm afraid off. While furthering studies, I'm doing some other multiple jobs. What jobs? It's secret. While I'm doing one of the job it was unexpectedly me to meet someone I knew long time ago. It is my housemate and my childhood friend. About my housemate, we are living in the same house, but don't know each other hometown. Haha. Kids these days don't know how to socialize face to face.

I'm currently moving forward to be better of me and hopefully I found what I'm searching for.

Look ma, I have a friend.

09 October 2017

Bestfriend


Hey, I just meet you. And this is craaaazy. Named is Black (Hitam). Because he is black. So, how I meet this cat? Its all started before I came home back from Johor by bus which is fasting month. I don't really like cat actually. I called them a virus because they didn't take a bath or wash their poop and I don't like the sound of meowing. I only love rabbit, not cat, eeewww. Okay, I know I have an annoying thought sometimes. Haha. But where is my rabbit? My mother sold them because we are moving to a new house. Before this, I don't even want to hold a cat except for this one. This cat's family member just died because of worm disease and his father just went missing after his mother giving birth. I felt so pity to see of his loss. He has nobody to be taking care of except me. And I have nobody to befriended except him. Haha. So, we are in the equal situation so why don't we be just friend?

People change :3

11 September 2017

Registration


I'm kinda lost here,
breathless.
scared,
hungry,
tired,
dying,
sad,
broken heart.
In the dark, 
I watch everyone disappear.
And I've been smiling like this for days.
:)

Dear Wana,
promise me you'll make it though this.
Decide what's wrong,
decide what's right,
decide this one in the light where I feel alive.

Out, busy~

Actually, I can.

24 August 2017

23rd


We were about to send Atok back to her hometown. It turns out, the surrounding turns dark. Its suddenly black out. I was about to turn off my phone and leave it in my room. I calmly walk in the dark to get my phone back to make it as a torch light. My family keeps yelling at my name because Atok might be late for her bus. I walk past the living room and suddenly they singing happy birthday to me. I was smiling and speechless. I realize that it's been a long time they didn't celebrate my birthday because I've been far away from my family when it is my birthday. Well, thanks for the treat in my 23rd. I never really display my birth date via social network when I was adult because I want to see who is my real friend. I used to wish everyone's birthday, but it turns out, nobody wishing me back. Hahaha. Never mind. This year, I receive an unexpected wished from friend after an update through the social network. They told me that I've been gone away too long and they missed me?


"Dear Nana, change is good."

19 August 2017

A visit from US family member

Umi Cha and Uncle Shafiq from US was here came to visit us. Uncle Shafiq went to Starbuck coffee in Taiping Central to get his coffee, suddenly the staff over there give him free drinks. And he gave that drink to me. This is my first time ever drank this expensive drink.


Uncle Shafiq used to call me "Miss 300" because when I was working in Johor, I keep telling him, my salary was RM300 per month, not RM300 per day. He keeps ignoring what I said and telling me that I was rich. Hahaha. We have a very long talk about DNA and anti-aging thing.



11 August 2017

Different

I know what it's like to feel.....different.
I'm not different.
Am I?

23 July 2017

Happy Eid 2017

Sibling group photo 
This year, we didn't have a proper family group photo as always since not all of us came in one time.

1 Syawal - Busy.

2 Syawal - Busy.

3 Syawal - I forgot what happen.

4 Syawal - I forgot.

5 Syawal - I forgot.

6 Syawal - Emm.

7 Syawal -

8 Syawal -

9 Syawal -

10 Syawal - Fasting. Drive Atok to Hospital Sultanah Aminah in JB.

11 Syawal - Fasting. Drive Atok, take the curtain from the tailor, send a fabric to a cloth tailor, went to Eco RM2 to buy a garden tent, fill in RM30 oil at Petron, went to the wholesale shop to buy boxes of water and biscuits, went to wedding shop to buy flowers plastic. At night, we car pool with Mak Ani to 3 houses.

12 Syawal - Fasting. Drive Atok and Tok Anum to Bank Islam. Send Tok Anum back to her home. Went to Maybank. Went to DIY. Went to food stall for Tok Jah food. Went to watch shop. Went to the pet shop. Went back home. Fall asleep.

13 Syawal -

14 Syawal - Went to 2 wedding invitation. Get 1 angpow.

15 Syawal - Went to 5 houses for marhaban. I get 3 angpow.

16 Syawal - In the morning, we went to Kedai Tok Jai to take roti arab that atok ordered. Then we went to frozen shop to buy plastic. It was marhaban at Atok's house. We manage to clean all the mess by a strange man helping hand who help us washing the dishes.

17 Syawal - Fasting. Went to kedai nasi ayam to buy 6 nasi ayam.

18 Syawal -

19 Syawal -

20 Syawal -

21 Syawal -

22 Syawal -

23 Syawal - Fasting

24 Syawal - Fasting

25 Syawal - Fasting

26 Syawal -

27 Syawal -

28 Syawal -

29 Syawal -

30 Syawal -

*will continue update soon

05 July 2017

But why?

Nobody knows me I'm cold.
Walk down this road all alone .
It's no one's fault but my own.
It's the path I've chosen to go.
Frozen as snow I show no emotion whatsoever so.
Don't ask me why I have no love. 

I wonder why I care?
I wonder why I couldn't forget?
I wonder why I changed? 
I wonder who you are?
I shouldn't know you.
It's really damn weird. 
It haven't start yet, but you are my biggest mistake.
This fairy tale should end.
The ending is the starting line.
Remember, whoever I need is Allah.
Stay closer to Quran.
Insyaallah, I'll be fine. 

The key was tossed away.
The door closed until my wishes came true.

Allah closes Doors that no Man
can Open and opens Doors that
no Man can Close. May he open
all the Doors you require to live
your life to the full....
Sharing the goodness and love that
is in your heart, will always leave you
When Allah is accepting Duas,may
yours be one of them. When he is
forgiving people, may you be one of
them. When you meet your friends
and family in heaven, may I be one
of them...
Allah is the reason for the joy we share,
the love we give and the hope that fills
our heart with peace. I wish you
Extravagant love and abundant joy...

15 June 2017

Open fasting with people for the first time.


Hye there, I know the title seem so anti-social. I'm living out here alone, so there is less opportunity for me to spend my time dining out with friends. Who the fish want to dining out with me? *just kidding. In this semester I was entirely busy to catching up my studies and facing some money crisis. That fishing internet plan always accidentally eating my quota through my bank account. To make long story short, one fine day, the day I finally finished my fyp correction, Kak Miza invited me to open fasting with her.

27 May 2017

Healing by listening to Quran

I found happiness.

"Just Listen to Quran. Keep Listening to it. Day after Day. InshaAllah, your heart will soften, your eyes would get wet, your mind would be at peace and you would be able to worship Allah better and better with each passing day."



Personal Experience
 The reason behind writing this article is my own personal experience with the Holy Quran. I was with the Holy Quran all the time; even while I am sleeping I used to leave the radio on with reciting the Holy Quran. As a matter of fact, I had no idea at that time about the technique of learning during sleep!!!
After a few months, I noticed great changes inside me. I felt that each one of my brain cells is vibrating and reacting with the voice of the Holy Quran recitation I was listening to. I was memorizing the Holy Quran using the technique of listening and repeating the chapter many times. Therefore, I found that the verses of the Holy Quran were getting easily into my memory.
Twenty years ago I told one of my friends that listening to the Holy Quran recitation reprogrammed the brain cells completely! But a few days ago I was really surprised to read about the experiments of the scientists in treating some of the incurable diseases using the sound waves of music. Some of the researchers such as the American scientist Annie Williams ,who is using the music therapy technique, has come out with important results. Those results, however, was limited until now because of the inability of the music to create the required effects on the cells. Nevertheless, she asserts that she has come up with unbelievable results in treating the Colon Cancer and the Brain Tumor and other diseases. She also states that the sense of creativity has been increased in each one of the patients who has listened to the recorded music.
Consequently , I'd like here to mention to my dear readers the results I got from the long period of listening to the recitation of the Holy Quran: I feel now that I have become stronger than before, that the immunity of my body has increased ,and my character has become better ,especially in dealing with people. The Holy Quran has also awakened the sense of creativity inside me and all these articles I wrote in a short period were the result of reading and listening to the Holy Quran constantly .
I can say , my dear reader, that constant listening to the Holy Quran increases the creativity in the human being and this is what happened to me. I still remember that before reading and memorizing the Holy Quran I was unable to write a single sentence correctly , but now I am able to write a scientific research paper in a day or a couple of days.
So we can see that listening to the Holy Quran does not only help in healing illnesses, but also contributes to developing the human personality and the communication skills together with the ability of creativity and coming up with new ideas. Therefore, you, dear reader, can try this and definitely will get fantastic results.

What is the best medicine?
The best medicine to cure all illnesses is the Holy Quran. This is a result of a long time experience in treating people. Many cases that had incurable illnesses recovered after exposing them to the recitation of Holy Quran. That is because of the ability of Holy Quran in rebalancing the brain cells and increasing their capability in performing well.
Each cell has a vibrating system that Allah has created to do its job and those cells do not understand the speech language but they deals with frequencies and vibrations like those in the mobile phones which receive electromagnetic waves and in turn send other waves. Therefore, we can say, metaphorically, that in each cell there is a very complex mobile phone. And you can imagine thousand billions of cells in your brain vibrating rhythmically in a way that no human being can understand , realize or imitate and if any cell was being in disorder , all the body would be in a disorder. So Holy Quran is a blessing that urges us to thank Allah . But do we really appreciate such a blessing??

The Verses of Holy Quran Heal
 According to the recent discoveries, scientists say that any illness must make a change in reprogramming the cells and each cell works according to a certain program from birth to death. Therefore, any physical or psychological disorder causes a confusion in the vibration system of the cell which makes a disorder in the cellular program. So we need to restore and correct this program in order to heal this disorder.
During my meditation with the Holy Quran , I found that there is a very precise digital system in each verse. Those verses, however, do not only carry the language of numbers but also carry some thing like what we call "data" or "programs" that can deal with the cells. Therefore, we can say that those verses carry the language of those cells!!!!
The reader may think this unscientific theory, but I assure you that I found a lot of verses in the Quran confirming that the Holy Quran verses carry a lot of data exactly like those normal radio waves used in carrying information, music , sounds and so on.
Allah says in His Holy book
Had it been possible for a Lecture to cause the mountains to move , or the earth to be torn asunder , or the dead to speak , this Quran would have done so . Nay , but Allah ' s is the whole command .(Ra'd:13:31)
If we deeply analyze this verse we, we can come up with this question: How can the Holy Quran cause the mountain to move, or the earth to be torn or the dead to speak?? The answer is through the data that only dead people can understand.
As the mountains are concerned, it is known that the earth layers move slowly nearly few centimeter a year, driving the mountains to move, too. This movement is resulted from thermal waves produced from the melting area under the crust. Therefore, we can say that the Quran contains data that can deal with these thermal waves causing layers to stir and move faster that makes cracks and earthquakes; and cuts the crust into many small pieces. This great power is put in the Holy Quran, but we are not allowed to reach it . Instead ,we have been told about this great power to realize how great is this Holy Book. Now, Can this Holy Book which has this advantage of this great power heal weak creatures like human beings???
When Allah tells us that this Holy Quran is a" healing", this means that it carries data and programs sufficient to heal the damaged cells in the body and cures what the doctors was incapable of.

The amazing effect resulting from Listening to Quran
 The continuous listening to the recitation of Holy Quran gives you the following real fruitful results:
-                      increase the immunity of the body
-                      enhance the creativity sense
-                      improve the concentration ability
-                      heal the chronic and incurable illnesses
-                      change the behavior and enable people to communicate better and gain trust
-                      create inner peace and heal the neural tensions
-                      heal nervousness, irritation and precipitation
-                      improve the ability of taking right decisions
-                      decrease fear and hesitation
-                       improve and strengthen the personality
-                      heal the normal illnesses such as allergy, headache, flu ,etc.
-                      improve the speech ability
-                      protect from diseases such as cancer and so on
-                      Change some bad habits such as excessive eating and smoking

 Dear reader! those things I mentioned above are the results I myself got: I remember I was a heavy smoker and could not imagine giving up smoking ever, but after the continuous listening to the Holy Quran I found myself giving up smoking without any effort. I was really surprised "how my life changed and why? But after I read about the recent technique in healing ,one of which was the therapy by sounds and sound frequencies, I knew the secret of this great change in my life. It was listening to the recitation of the Holy Quran. What I simply did was only listening to the Holy Quran continuously.
To conclude, I 'd like to tell you a fact that I encountered and really tried: howsoever you spend your time in reading or listening to the Holy Quran, you will find that this time will not be wasted nor decreased . But you will notice that you will always have an extra time. You will find that the same works that takes sometimes days or hours to be done can be finished in few minutes only!!!
"O mankind! There has come unto you an exhortation from your Lord , a healing for that which is in the breasts ,and a guidance and a mercy for believers . Say : In the bounty of Allah and in His mercy : therein let them rejoice . It is better than what they hoard . (Jonah:10:57,58)"
--------------------
By: Abduldaem Al-Kaheel

12 May 2017

I'm exotic


Throwback moment when I'm in my working space. I'm so exited to do my work. While doing my work, I'm chitchatting with my workmate.

H: Kau mesti ramai orang mengoratkan?
Me: Takde lah. Takde sape nak ngorat pun.
H: Yeke?
Me: Betul la. Takde sape nak pandang pun. Pergi mana2 pun takde sapa kacau.
H: Hahaha. Aku rasa kau ni invisible la. Kau selalu duduk dekat rumah buat ape? Tengok tv tak? Cerita apa?
Me: Tak tengok TV pun. Tengok pun TV1.
H: Hah? TV1? Zaman sekarang mana ada orang tengok TV1 sangat. TV1 tengok ape? 
Me: Berita.
H: Hah? Berita? Kau tak tengok korea ke? Bukan perempuan suka tengok korea ke?
Me: Tak pun. Tak suka laa korea.
H: Kau ni exotic la. Kau tahu tak ape exotic?
Me: Tahu. Pelik la kan?
H: Hahaha. Kenapa? Ada orang panggil kau exotic ke?
Me: Haha. Takde la.
H: Habis selalu kau buat ape ha?
Me: ..........Bace.............quran...
H: Kau dah berapa kali katam quran.
Me: Ade laa..
H; Ade lagi rupanya orang macam kau. Lelaki suka perempuan baik. Serious aku cakap.
Me: Iyeke.

Meanwhile, in other situation....

H: Takkan takde sape nak ngorat kau? Nak kata tak cantik, cantik jugak. Takde ke yang macam tersenyum2 dekat kau?
Me: Hehe. Takde pun. Takde sape nak pandang.

Behind the scene, its was my experience facing the things I'm always hate and afraid off.


07 May 2017

Kenduri doa selamat

Kenduri doa selamat.
I was home after completing my FYP pre-viva
and also almost completing my FYP with the final result.
I'm kindda losser nowadays. 
Just wish me luck in the future.
The end.
Busy.
Out~

18 February 2017

You're Not There


I only got you in my stories
And you know I tell them right
I remember you and I, when I'm awake at night
So give it up for fallen glory
I never got to say goodbye
I wish I could ask for just a bit more time

Every step I take, you used to lead the way
Now I'm terrified to face it on my own

You're not there
To celebrate the man that you made
You're not there
To share in my success and mistakes
Is it fair?
You'll never know the person I'll be
You're not there
With me

Though I know that you're not there
I still write you all these songs
It's like you got the right to know what's going on
As I struggle to remember how you used to look and sound
At times I still think I can spot you in the crowd

Every step I take, you used to lead the way
And now I'm terrified to face it on my own

You're not there
To celebrate the man that you made
You're not there
To share in my success and mistakes
Is it fair?
You'll never know the person I'll be
You're not there
With me

Time can heal your wounds if you're strong and standing tall
I've been doing all of that, it didn't help at all
They say, "You'll grow older, and it'll get better still."
Yes, I will, but no, it won't
They don't get it, 'cause

You're not there
To celebrate the man that you made
You're not there
To share in my success and mistakes
Is it fair?
You'll never know the person I'll be
You're not there
With me


*LYRICS
:)

10 February 2017

Online Business

I joined an online business through Facebook. I didn't expect that I must sell that product through online. They said that we can make RM1k each month by using our personal Facebook. So, I begin to try out their tips during my semester break. Their tips are you have updated your status at least 3 times per day on your personal Facebook. I posted in one month and there is only 2 customer in my friend list are interested about my product. The rest customer I get is from 'page' and 'buy and sell group'. I guess it was the most embarrassing thing that I ever did because I didn't used to tell about myself everyday in public. I do gained some money tho, and manage to become top seller in the team. Wahh!!

I notice that I begin not to read Quran 9-15 page per day like I used to read every day. My Quran reading is decreased to 2 page per day or not reading Quran at all. When my customer PM me, I skip my Quran reading just to gain more customer. I also begin to left my solat sunat Hajat and Tahajud and only did solat sunat Dhuha everyday. I feel regret with my action during this semester break. My distance with Allah become further, but my distance with humans on Facebook become closer. The good things is I begin to gain more friend and made an engagement with my old friends. The bad things is I begin to distance myself with Allah. So, before it's too late, I decided to stop with that routine.

Yup. I'll STOP
The conclusion is, my ambition is I don't want to be an online business woman. I don't want to self working with unbalance income. There's a lot of dramas in online business. At least I know the art in online business and they (seller) can't lie to me no more. At this moment, I will still sell that product but in slow motion mode. Hehehe.

My ambition is I want to further my studies, experience as engineer and becoming a lecture. And that's final.

~out, fyp