Taylor Swift - Mean

ramai orang tanya "wana, kemana menghilang?"

All of sudden, she dead :(

They all went out when I reached home. I've been waiting for m##, to guide me on physic test for tomorrow. All of a sudden, late in evening. There's a ring on telephone. Bibik answered it. Ahmad started crying. I was in my room wondering why? And where had they been in this late hour? I'm feeling fright to know. They bringing a bad news, that she was dead. How could the hospital send her away. It must be a curse. This is fate. Just walk home, to hope and pray. I wish I could see her after SPM. But I just meet her dead body yesterday, sitting beside her and reading Yasin with my brother. I miss her dearly, this I do. They started blaming each other, fighting about money and etc. Family crisis still goes on. If today is so bad, tomorrow will be worse. I don’t know what I did to face the war tomorrow.

But still, it’s hard to believe its true.
(*just trying to be happy and strong.)

~out, SPM

Eid Mubarak 2011

Raya ni aku tak raya :(
tok sakit kat Johor

Family semua balik Johor, 

macam biasa aku kena tinggal rumah sorang2 lagi
macam orang gila =.=
kalau boleh aku NAK IKUT.
NAK IKUT!
NAK IKUT!
NAK IKUT!
tapi kakak nasihatkan 'takpayah'
so, tinggal lah.

(p/s: just ignore me! K Bye.)

Larian 1 Murid 1 Sukan 1 Malaysia

Yesterday I've being scolded just because of the sport shoes issue. I don't know what come over me but I really don't like it. I cant sleep at night. I hope I'm happy to go trough today. 

This is how the days goes :

pukul5 buat air. Amad turun bawah amek tawel tiba2 pastu mandi. minum. naik atas. siap2 kelam kabut kemas barang. naik kereta. terlupa pakai satu benda. patah balik. pakai benda tu. naik kereta. a**h berhenti dekat depan pejabat pos. Amad amek baju. jalan dengan a**h pegi padang Esplanade. Subahanaallah. tak penah aku ade dalam situasi macam ni. aku suka. rase exited gila. orang ramai macam nak berperang. sampai padang a**h pegi tempat lain. tinggal aku sorang. pusing2 cari group convent. lalu depan. jumpa Syndee. cari group convent sama2. jalan2 da jumpa. amek reben dekat Cik Mas. nak gulung2. Hawa tolong pegang kan. pastu dia tolong ikat kan. pastu nak tampal nombor dekat perut. bla bla bla. countdown same2. mula lari dengan Hawa. tamat lari dengan Hawa jugak. nampak Ain Madiha main kompang. dengar 'U Mobile' membebel. bersama Sharifah. jumpa mak Rita dan Rita. salam2. Rita dan Natasha join aerobik atas pentas. amek makanan. tunggu cabutan bertuah. tak dapat. ikot Hawa dan Rita masok khemah K.E cari orang. Sharifah takot nak masok. jalan2 tepi khemah. dapat roti free. jalan2. Hawa jumpa Salman. muka dia ada warna. Sharifah ajak tengok pertandingan sorak. DIA tegor. muka dia pon ada warna. pegi tengok sorak dengan Sharifah. berdiri lama2. turn Convent last. Convent menang sorak untuk kategeri perempuan. SMDB menang untuk kategeri lelaki. pastu aku jalan sorang2. terjumpa Sheshe dan Adila. cakap best la menang. dia pelok aku. tepon u** suroh amekkan. jalan sorang2 sampai kat tennis court. tunggu jap. u** sampai. naik keta. kena marah lagi. dia tanya nape tak jalan kaki balik uma je? *kalo tak bole amek cakap jela. aku bole jalan kaki sendiri. aku diam je. sampai rumah spoil mood aku habis. aku lupa aku happy ke tak tadi. 

Pesta Ria TMGS

Imagine 45 minutes lining up along the corridor just to enter the hunted house. Trust me, these thing can easily sucked up the 'i am handsome' confidence straight out of you. There are some people who incharge treat people like a bullshit. The customer was being scolded from getting too crowded along the entrance. They just wont give your money back once touch the entrance paper even you didn't enter yet. Hellllooo. it just a small piece of paper that value for nothing. These people must been forgot about the 'customer always rite' rite? 

The hunted house was great. I'm the back person in the line. It seriously shock me when the gost keep scaring me from my back, and it involuntary action me to just scream like hell. It embracing me then when I just realize that I was hug Rita from her back along the way. When it just comes to exit, I just think that 'uh? why I hug her? what an earth am I doing?'. Then, I quickly put my hand off from her. Lucikly, no one saw that. hihi:p

This is the day that I saw a lot of my old buddies. I feel composed of each remembered name. But I am here just pretending not to know them. Time changes and they know damn as well. I dont even think they remember me since I slip away. But just face it. The worse nightmare was over. *sedar ape yang aku dapat bila dah hilang :(

Anyway, tenggs for today. Today was great coz I was enjoying the bites even it been for a while moment with two of her. 

fine

Before this blog starting to look dead, I'd better post something. The face of another day. Life getting better and I'm getting so fine :) with stable electron arrangement. Thanks God. I love you more.

Mom! I will succeed and I will put you out of your misery. There will only be bright days ahead. Have in faith in me! So, how are you going to be succeed anyways? Designer! World's top fashion designer! Stop being foolish, will you? :P I want to be a doctor. Not a designer. The thing that I want to tell here is do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth? I think it was "A whole lot of truthful truth that". 

Failed was the unforgiving to accept from dear parent. I rather do anything to avoid this.  I might as well make my own exam result, plus A's :P But the problem is I dont really understand what the hell i've been learning this month , huh. 

The reality world has kept me busy and awaaaaaay busy to spend time writing useless shits. So, the bottomline, im busy. 

I WANT 9A+ SO BADLY :(

wah!! dia pelok aku dohh..

Tadi ada program kecermerlangan tingkatan5. Dia tabole datang sebenanya tapi dia datang jugak.


2.40 pm berator tepi Dewan Konsert. Maksuk Dewan. Nyanyi lagu negaraku dan negeri perak. Duduk. Pn Rahimah berucap. Perasmian. Bangun. Duduk. Pn Ang berucap. Tetamu berucap.Cikgu berikra. Ibu bapa berikra. Kite orang berikra. Jerit "kami boleh!!". Duduk.


Masa nak semat lencana, aku salam dia. Pastu dia pinkan lencana. Sambil tu aku senyum2 je macam kerang busuk. Then aku salam dia lagi. Pastu aku saje je nak cakap "peluk?". Tiba2 dia peluk aku. Aku terkejut. Sebelum ni aku tak pena peluk dia. Tiba2 aku rasa macam nak nangis. *cheh, perlu ke? haha. Tapi aku tahan je. Lama betol aku tak nangis kan?


Masa time menjamu selera. Dia nak makan sebenarnya tapi sebab aku ada tusyen Bio kejap lagi dia tak jadi. Kita org terus balik. Aku kelam kabut nak siap pegi tusyen Bio. 


Mase nak dekat balik Sir aja pasal jenis2 glands. Pastu dia tanya macam mana ibu susuan boleh menyusukan anak? Dan dari mana dia dapat susu? Cara dia, dia amek injection untuk satu glands(aku lupa nama glands tu) ni bertindak menghasilkan susu. Glands ni pulak terletak di dalam memmery glands. Kitaorang tanya 'memmery glands' tu ape? Dia diam je, tak jawab. Pastu dia tulis perkataan 'MEMMERY GLANDS' dalam kurungan 'female brest'. haha. semua orang gelak. budak laki yang ketawa lebih2. Sir buat muka be'ngang. Sir cakap "cuba la open minded siket. kamu ni dah la amek science stream. benda ni benda untuk belaja bukan untuk jadi bahan lawak. kalau kamu nak lawak2 tak payah la amek Bio. amek je LP. blablabla..." pastu dia suruh la jadi open minded sikit untuk terima pelajaran. pastu dia cakap pasal pelajar cemerlang punya atitude la ubah sikap jadi matured sikit la dan lain2 lagi. Lastly dia ingatkan yang SPM lagi 7 bulan. Dia cakap "kamu pura-pura jadi matang selama 7 bulan pun tape. untuk SPM. lepastu kalau nak nakal balik. nakal la." :P

they are still they

Still searching for Totis? Yeah, they still searching for me. Actually I want to avoid myself from facing them forever. Can't forget my worst nightmare until today. Its been a year I din't have any connection with them. There's one situation that they beg me to come along with them to complete the last moment. Without me, they can't complete with 4 of us even she remind me that I'm not the same.

I have no idea how am I suppose to reach there. I'm home alone right now and nobody can help me catch there. After a short think, she give me a hint with a taxi phone number. She suggest me to take a cab. And that's a good idea. 

This may be our first or last chapter to meet us all together. They still the same. There's no regret inside them. They cant change me to be like them like I used to be. I'm already change into a kind stuff. Thank god for save me from the dark by showing me the right path to go. *Its okay I'll keep their DIRTY SECRET.

The part of our today is one of us are awesome! She bet a pool game with a dick and she won the game. Then, we also play snooker until we are surrender to play. After that, one of the best part is we scream together in a box until the session end. *sorry, no hardcore for you girls.

Time past by like lightning. Its time to leave. I made the end here first. A hug make me feel better to know that we have to leave. Maybe until forever T_T 


THE END

heavy fever

 

I am READY. 

Its time for show time. 

Of course I feel pleasant. 

I REALLY REALLY want to make trough this, 

but the fever arrive. 

So, I get a medicine from 7e to avoid the fever. 

I ask the cashier for a fever medicine, 

but the cashier gave me a gastric medicine. 

I just realize it when Im already take the pill.

I try to fight back the fever,

but it no use because the fever was to heavy,

The agenda was keep going even it was raining.

A kind buddies just came to replace me.

THERE WILL BE NO NEXT TIME.

I can't accept the replacement T_T

Same by in this team.

I don't think I cant afford through this.

I can't accept the fate.

My eyes began to fill up,

but I forced myself to just stay although this is wasted.

How am I supposed to feel about the things I’ve done.

I don’t know if I should stay or turn around and run.

My next time was already at the end.

 

Im so sick of all of this.

Im tired being in the same luck,

when is my time being up there?

SEMUA ORANG KEJAM, DUNIA MEMANG TAK ADIL

 

out desperate ~

In top 24

This is going to be about the damn fun game , but an unforgiving true fact. Its almost funny when I made a gayteacher fall down on the grown.

One damn left person hit the ball toward me. I suppose to pass it by hit the ball into goal, but he just take it and push away for us to chase. He just like damn um ohh. I mean what wrong with him? Did he think he has a good skill enough? 

By then, he missed the ball and it awesomely hit by me. Then, he tripped and fell in the middle of the field and being laughed. Pitty him. Guess how does he feel? So, embarrassing rite? HAHA.

Dont get me wrong, Im not afraid a bit to him. Infact this it is just pretty funny.

Ohh wait. I haven't told you about my old buddies. Its turn out there. God meet us on the field. She still hail me as "Totis" since yesterday until today. Its remind me our sweet moment. Thats SWEET as her did, aww :)

Okayokay thats enough Wana.

out~

WATTS AND KNOTTS (jokes)

KNOTT : "Who's calling?" was the answer to the telephone.

WATT : "Watt."

KNOTT : "What is your name, please?"

WATT : "Watt's my name."

KNOTT : "That's what I asked you. What's your name?"

WATT : "That's what I told you. Watt's my name."

[A long pause, and then from Watt,]

WATT : "Is this James Brown?"

KNOTT : "No, this is Knott."

WATT : "Please tell me your name."

KNOTT : "Will Knott."

[YOU LEFT THE TALKERS AT A POINT WHERE THEY WERE TOTALLY CONFUSED, READTHE REST OF WHAT HAPPENED...]

WATT : "Why not?"

KNOTT : "Huh? What do you mean why not?"

WATT : "Yeah! Why won't you tell me your name?"

KNOTT : "But I told you my name!"

WATT : "Didn't you say you will not?"

KNOTT : "Not not, knott, Will Knott!"

WATT : "That's what I mean."

KNOTT : "So you know my name."

WATT : "Of course not!"

KNOTT : "Good. So now, what is yours?"

WATT : "Watt. Yours?"

KNOTT : "Your name!"

WATT : "Watt's my name."

KNOTT : "How the hell do I know? I am asking you!"

WATT : "Look I have been very patient and I have told you my name and you have not even told me yours yet."

KNOTT : "You have been patient, what about me? I have told you my name so many times and it is you who have not told me yours yet.

WATT : Of course not!"

KNOTT : "See, you even know my name!"

WATT : "Of course not!"

KNOTT : "Then why do you keep saying of course Knott?"

WATT : "Because I don't." 
[Pause]

KNOTT : "What is your name?"

WATT : "See, you know my name!"

KNOTT : "Of course not!"

WATT : "Then why do you keep asking Watt is your name?"

KNOTT : "To find out your name!"

WATT : "But you already know it!"

KNOTT : "What?"

WATT : "See!"

KNOTT : "And you know mine!"

WATT : "Of course not!"

KNOTT : "Exactly!"

[NOW THEY ARE AT A POINT WHERE BOTH THINK THE OTHER KNOWS THEIR NAME, BUT THEY THEMSELVES DON'T KNOW THE OTHER'S NAME.]

KNOTT : "Listen, listen, wait; if I asked you what your name is, what will be your answer?"

WATT : "Watt's my name."

KNOTT : "No, no, give me only one word."

WATT : "Watt"

KNOTT : "Your name!"

WATT : "Right!"

[pause before it hits him]

KNOTT : "Oh, Wright!"

WATT : "Yeah!"

KNOTT : "So why didn't you say it before?"

WATT : "I told you so many times!"

KNOTT : "You never said Wright before"

WATT : "Of course I did."

KNOTT : "Ok I won't argue any more. Do you know my name?"

WATT : "I do not."

KNOTT : "Well, there you go, now we know each other's name."

WATT : "I do not!"

KNOTT : "Good!"

[pause before it hits him]

WATT : "Oh, Guud!"

KNOTT : "Good."

WATT : "No wonder, it took me so long, is that Dutch?"

KNOTT : "No, it's Knott!"

WATT : "Oh, okay. At least the names are clear now Guud."

KNOTT : "Yes Wright."

[NOW THEY BOTH THINK THEY KNOW EACH OTHER'S NAME AS WELL! Watt do you think ?? Do they or do they Knott ???]

Mark me a hole

Fear not , I'm not dead yet. I'm still here baby. Let me explain , the past few weeks without no updates is solely because I've entirely unforgivably busy. Only god knows how busy am I. Why ?

I'm sure it's been a while since the I last updated this forsaken thing .

Actually I've been overly and entirely busy that I forgot about this blog. Thanks to the fucking homeworks on hold from the douchebag's at the smk. They event dont give a crap to know how you'd feel. Here I show you my homework list :

It just a plain wtf rite ?

And it is the Chinese new year , the month of prosperity they say. The time where you should be relaxing and begging your chinese friend for a cheap bastard ang pau's by enjoying those rare sweet oranges while watching some 1970's porno. If you did that. LOL

Too add it up , gayvalentine is here too and where the fuck is my chocolate. HEY, I WANT MY CHOC , CHOC !

just feel hell like home

Still stuck in the hell. But this time the hell seen so different. The hell was make me smile. The hell make my day a day. The hell make me feel the bites of happiness like there's no tomorrow. Thank you for everything. But yet it become so different feel when I am invisible. Like I have nothing to do. Ofcoz I hate that feeling. Its okay. I DONT CARE MUCH !!

Being a student is fun and enjoying. But everybody know the agonizing part of it. The up and down as they say. We all have different styles on how to handle every problem we have. My way to handle my problems is not think about it over and over again so it no longer bothers me. But there’s one problem that I can’t easily get rid off it and it seen come to an end. It is Sick.

It start from the trauma moment. It already became a habit. I always woke up on school days with the end to school with stress feel. Maybe Im too long keep myself in the dark until Im afraid of the light. Even, when on some meetings of friends or an event I always be the kind of bad respond person. It just like "kehadiran aku bagaikan tiang gol yang barnyawa"

Its okay. I dont care it either. I am here. I am alone. And dont need anyone help. I sure I can do it all by myself. What I need is just to get enough sleep.

I’ve got used to prepare myself to mind set it back. Since these day, I try to change my attitude even it seems to hard for me. I’ll start to change this practice little by little until it fades away completely. Hey, Im still on the period of changing. I hope it works to change a part of me. For sure I have much time left to change it :D